[[Notes]]
- Topics: [[Communication]]
- People: Katherine Hampsten
- Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gCfzeONu3Mo
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## Summary
- You must actively listen. Really listen. Passive hearing is not the same.
- Listen with everything. Communication is more than just words. Meaning often comes from words unspoken.
- [[Take time to understand as you try to be understood]]. Communication works both ways.
- Be truly open - open to the idea that you may not be right. See the potential truth in others.
- Communication is complex. It is made more complex with the increase of noise. Focus on the signal from the noise. **Derive meaning from the mess**.
- Despite our differences, we can still establish a shared understanding together, creating the common ground on which we can all stand on.
## Notes
### Complexity
- "Even when face to face with another person int he very same room, speaking the same language, human communication is very complex."
- The complexity of conversation grows exponentially to the amount of people conversing as well as distractions.
- It becomes exponentially more difficult to focus on the signal from the noise - to **derive meaning from the mess**.
### Models of communication
- **Transmission model** - Communication is about messages that move directly from one person to another. It's a model that focuses purely on the exchange of the message and nothing else - similar to someone you a tossing a ball, and then walking away.
- **Transaction model** - Communication is more like a game of catch between people. As we communicate, we received feedback.
- "Through the transaction, **we create meaning together**."
### The exchange
- Effective communication requires feedback, which can take the form of both verbal and non-verbal cues, such as a "yes" or a nod. This helps signal to the speaker that a connection has been made and is being maintained.
- The back and forth exchange of messages and feedback means that the people conversing are engaged, or engaged enough.
- If the conversation is mostly one way, it becomes more of a lecture than an exchange.
### Interpretation
- "As humans, we can't help but send and receive messages through our subjective lens."
- As messages get exchanged, interpretation from all parties are expressed and received.
- "Our perception filters continually shift meaning and interpretations."
- It's like a game of catch, but with a lump of clay. The clay being shaped and reshaped by each person as they touch it - molding it to fit their own unique perception (and biases).
- Messages are also based on the **relationships between** the people conversing, on top of things like knowledge, experience, and language syntax.
### Simple practices
- "Recognize that passive hearing and active listening are not the same thing."
- "Engage actively with the verbal and non-verbal feedback of others, and adjust your message to facilitate greater understanding."
- "Listen with your eyes and ears, as well as with your gut."
- "Communication is more than just words."
- [[Take time to understand as you try to be understood]].
- "In the rush to express ourselves, it's easy to forget that communication is a 2-way street."
- "Be open to what the other person might say."
- [[Stop talking, start listening. Stop dismissing, start persuading. Stop shutting down, start opening our minds.]]
- "Be aware of your personal perceptual filters"
- "Elements of your experience influence how you see the world."
- "Don't assume your perception is the object truth."
- Share a dialogue with others to reach a common understanding together.
## Original
![[How miscommunication happens, and how to avoid it-1.jpg]]
![[How miscommunication happens, and how to avoid it-2.jpg]]
![[How miscommunication happens, and how to avoid it-3.jpg]]